Updated: Jul 30
Well… You made it through Thanksgiving. You may have had difficulty shaking the thoughts or memories of loved ones no longer with you, but hopefully you were still overwhelmed with love. You made it through Christmas. The hustle and bustle of the season has simmered down. Now it’s the end of the year! A time many dedicate to reflecting. We find ourselves with intentional hearts of gratitude for making it through another year. However, if we’re honest, for some of us this year did not go as expected. All of us may not have had the most transformative year of our lives. If you fit in that category, I want to speak to you.
Maybe this year you felt every single blow that came your way. Maybe you feel like life has had you in neutral. You felt a little lost in the sauce, not sure which way was up and which way was down. Maybe you’re ending the year with some goals unmet and some expectations not fulfilled. Maybe you've realized you're right where you were this time last year. It’s very possible and guess what? It IS okay.
When this happens, we quickly beat ourselves up, or talk down to ourselves. For those who are Believers, we question God, wondering if there’s a disconnect in the "phone line" between you and Him. We think we’ve failed or we’re stuck. But the truth is ..... you’re not stuck. You’ve grown!
I find myself saying this to others: “process is not linear”. But if I’m honest, I sometimes forget this myself. Process is not linear and neither is progress. For "go getters" & "do gooders", who put in work or are intentional about making the right decisions, I think we can sometimes forget this. Although we do our best to make the right decisions, we cannot control or prepare for.....life simply happening. It’s in those moments I can be extremely hard on myself. I mean, my mind G O E S .... from worse (skip bad) to the worst! “I’m stuck.” “I’ll always be here.” “I’ll always be like this.” “This will not change.” “What is it about me that causes this to keep happening?”....(I’m just speaking for myself) But the truth is ..... I am growing STILL! There were times before where I couldn’t even realize “this” was problematic. Now, I can see it & soon I’ll be able to stop this behavior, way of thinking and/or speaking before engaging in it.
The truth is…I am STILL growing & so are you!
So as we are concluding this year ALIVE, extend compassion to yourself. Disarm the lies by rehearsing the truth! You are still on this earth for a reason and someone needs you. Remember, process and progress are not linear journeys, and this journey you're on will empower someone else to keep going.
Here’s a video I’ve been watching a lot for the past few weeks (shoutout to Joseph Solomon, check out his videos). Sometimes we need the reminder that regardless of the external... what’s uncontrollable and controllable, you are getting better because you’re STILL growing! God, as our Father, loves us so much that He makes it HIS BUSINESS to grow us, diligently and patiently! God is faithful to complete everything He’s started in you.
Disclaimer: Now from the first looks of the title you may mentally check out and say, “Now Diamond, this looks depressing. I don’t have time for this”. HEAR ME OUT lol! This is meant to encourage you. To shift your perspective and help you look forward to your future and expected end. Whether or not things get better, there’s a guarantee that you do!
I’m rooting for you, always.
Diamond James, MSW, LCSWA